Status Updates: Homeless In Hollywood

Nomadic Life By The Numbers

So I moved all my wordly belongings into storage today before I hit the East Coast for the rest of the month while waiting for my new place in Hollywood to be ready. Being a seasoned nomad, I’m pretty skilled at being able to pack up and move in a day and don’t boast most of the type of clutter most other people who don’t move states every fews months have. I do however, have an obsessive shoe collection that filled three of my hampers.

Since this is the longest I’ve lived in one place in years (full 12 months), I came across more random collections than I had in moves past. My roomies found my closets so amusing we started writing these down:

Items that have sat untouched in my closet over the past year: Nintendo NES, softball glove and shoes, all my DVDs, clothing iron.

Items I was hoping to find but didn’t: Halloween costumes, priceless vintage tutu, yearbooks/photos or any physical proof that I ever existed prior to MySpace.

Number of paper shopping bags I’ve managed to save now that I don’t have a live-in boyfriend always “accidentally” throwing them out: 46. (Most common: Bloomingdales, 16; Marc by Marc Jacobs, 9)

Ballet flat to heeled shoe ratio: 3 to 1. Athletic shoe to fashion shoe ratio (counting Softball cleats): 1 to 15.

Obsessive collections: Completely filled up journals: 4 (plus one half used I didn’t realize I had); Rosaries: 4;Cans of hairspray: 3; Bottles of toothpaste: 4; Things (?) of deodorant: 4; Unopened lighters (for candles): 1; Unopened mail: Too much to count. The worst: jury duty. Oops.

Best items found in the medicine cabinet: Bingo dapper, hammer and nails, dead spider (murdered by hairspray, was waiting for Dan to get back to remove the corpse)

And the killer

Number of Matching Black Joy Mango Huggable Hangers I’ve acquired by picking up one or two more set each time I go to Target over the last year: 140. BUT Number of clothing items still tossed on the shelf because I don’t have enough hangers and I never bought a dresser this year: 38. AND Number of those clothing items now enroute to Goodwill: 37 (I mean,I gotta hang on to the old Arizona State Wresting tee ).

UPDATE: Number of trips it took in Allison’s Ford Focus (rented) to move my entire life to the storage locker: 1.