Catholic Mother Guilt Trips: Getting Settled

Because no one can make you wish you were never born, quite like your Catholic mother

D: So now I’m traveling for the next few weeks but I’m having a lot of fun and it’s made me realize how lucky I am to have that freedom and a job that has allowed to see so much and experience so much.

Mom: That’s good. I’m glad you have that too. So what are you doing now?

D: I’m at the library looking for a book.

Mom: Oh, what book.

D: Um, a psychology book.

Mom: Psychology on what?

D: (Sigh.) Um, I’m trying to find a book on dating Mexican men.

Mom: Oh! Because of [Mexican crush back home].

D: What? No. It’s research for the book. One of the main themes of the book is the dissection of cultural dating habits in modern America and the Mexican has to be one of the cornerstones of her life, but I’ve never dated a Mexican long-term so I’m doing research.

Mom: I’ll ask your tios. I’m sure they have some advice for you.

D: Mom, again it’s not for me. I’m looking more for doctoral grade research.

Mom: I know, but I’m sure it couldn’t hurt for you too. I’d like to see you settle down soon, Sweetheart.

D: You just said you were happy for me because I’m not tied down.

Mom: I lied.